Bar jokes
- Greynomad
- Posts: 8020
- Joined: Tue Dec 04, 2012 4:16 pm
- Location: Rutherglen, Vic.
Bar jokes
A jumper lead walks into a bar.
The barman says, “I’ll serve you, just don’t start anything!”
##################
A dyslexic man walks into a bra.
The barman says, “I’ll serve you, just don’t start anything!”
##################
A dyslexic man walks into a bra.
Regards & God bless,
Ray
--
"Insufficient data for a meaningful answer."
Isaac Asimov, "The Last Question"
"I refuse to drink water, because of the disgusting things fish do in it"
W.C.Fields
Ray
--
"Insufficient data for a meaningful answer."
Isaac Asimov, "The Last Question"
"I refuse to drink water, because of the disgusting things fish do in it"
W.C.Fields
- BillieBlue
- Posts: 211
- Joined: Thu Aug 24, 2017 7:22 am
- Greynomad
- Posts: 8020
- Joined: Tue Dec 04, 2012 4:16 pm
- Location: Rutherglen, Vic.
Re: Bar jokes
MORE!!!
A man walks into a bar.
... Should have worn his glasses.
###########################
An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scot walk into a bar.
Barman says, "I hope you jokers are here for a drink."
###########################
Two fish bump into a concrete wall.
One of them says, "Dam!"
A man walks into a bar.
... Should have worn his glasses.
###########################
An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scot walk into a bar.
Barman says, "I hope you jokers are here for a drink."
###########################
Two fish bump into a concrete wall.
One of them says, "Dam!"
Regards & God bless,
Ray
--
"Insufficient data for a meaningful answer."
Isaac Asimov, "The Last Question"
"I refuse to drink water, because of the disgusting things fish do in it"
W.C.Fields
Ray
--
"Insufficient data for a meaningful answer."
Isaac Asimov, "The Last Question"
"I refuse to drink water, because of the disgusting things fish do in it"
W.C.Fields
- Greynomad
- Posts: 8020
- Joined: Tue Dec 04, 2012 4:16 pm
- Location: Rutherglen, Vic.
Re: Bar jokes
Did you hear about the dyslexic man who sold his soul to Santa?
Regards & God bless,
Ray
--
"Insufficient data for a meaningful answer."
Isaac Asimov, "The Last Question"
"I refuse to drink water, because of the disgusting things fish do in it"
W.C.Fields
Ray
--
"Insufficient data for a meaningful answer."
Isaac Asimov, "The Last Question"
"I refuse to drink water, because of the disgusting things fish do in it"
W.C.Fields
- Greynomad
- Posts: 8020
- Joined: Tue Dec 04, 2012 4:16 pm
- Location: Rutherglen, Vic.
Re: Bar jokes
A man walks into a bar with a lump of bitumen under his arm.
“Barman, I’ll have a beer now and one for the road.”
#########
A mushroom walks into a bar.
Barman says, “We don’t serve your kind here. “
“Why not?” asks the mushroom, “I’m a fun guy.”
(Don’t get it? Read it aloud...)
########
An atom walks into a bar.
Barman says, “We don’t serve your kind here. Split!”
########
An atom walks into a bar.
“Barman, could I have a beer on credit? I get paid tomorrow.”
“No way!” replies the Barman, “I don’t trust you atoms. You make up everything.”
“Barman, I’ll have a beer now and one for the road.”
#########
A mushroom walks into a bar.
Barman says, “We don’t serve your kind here. “
“Why not?” asks the mushroom, “I’m a fun guy.”
(Don’t get it? Read it aloud...)
########
An atom walks into a bar.
Barman says, “We don’t serve your kind here. Split!”
########
An atom walks into a bar.
“Barman, could I have a beer on credit? I get paid tomorrow.”
“No way!” replies the Barman, “I don’t trust you atoms. You make up everything.”
Regards & God bless,
Ray
--
"Insufficient data for a meaningful answer."
Isaac Asimov, "The Last Question"
"I refuse to drink water, because of the disgusting things fish do in it"
W.C.Fields
Ray
--
"Insufficient data for a meaningful answer."
Isaac Asimov, "The Last Question"
"I refuse to drink water, because of the disgusting things fish do in it"
W.C.Fields
- T1 Terry
- Posts: 13708
- Joined: Fri Nov 23, 2012 3:44 pm
- Location: Mannum South Australia by the beautiful Murray River
- Contact:
Re: Bar jokes
We don't serve your kind her
Two Higgs Boson walk into a bar
Two Higgs Boson walk into a bar
A person may fail many times, they only become a failure when they blame someone else John Burrows
If we have data, let’s look at data. If all we have are opinions, let’s go with mine. – Jim Barksdale, former Netscape CEO
If we have data, let’s look at data. If all we have are opinions, let’s go with mine. – Jim Barksdale, former Netscape CEO
- Greynomad
- Posts: 8020
- Joined: Tue Dec 04, 2012 4:16 pm
- Location: Rutherglen, Vic.
Re: Bar jokes
A Polar Bear walks into a bar, and says to the barman,
“I’ll have a Scotch and ..................
......................
...................... Dry”
Barman says, “What’s with the big pause?”
Bear replies, “Dunno. I was born with them. “
Ba-boom tish!!
“I’ll have a Scotch and ..................
......................
...................... Dry”
Barman says, “What’s with the big pause?”
Bear replies, “Dunno. I was born with them. “
Ba-boom tish!!
Regards & God bless,
Ray
--
"Insufficient data for a meaningful answer."
Isaac Asimov, "The Last Question"
"I refuse to drink water, because of the disgusting things fish do in it"
W.C.Fields
Ray
--
"Insufficient data for a meaningful answer."
Isaac Asimov, "The Last Question"
"I refuse to drink water, because of the disgusting things fish do in it"
W.C.Fields
- Greynomad
- Posts: 8020
- Joined: Tue Dec 04, 2012 4:16 pm
- Location: Rutherglen, Vic.
Re: Bar jokes
A horse walks into a bar.
Barman says, “Why the long face?”
Barman says, “Why the long face?”
Regards & God bless,
Ray
--
"Insufficient data for a meaningful answer."
Isaac Asimov, "The Last Question"
"I refuse to drink water, because of the disgusting things fish do in it"
W.C.Fields
Ray
--
"Insufficient data for a meaningful answer."
Isaac Asimov, "The Last Question"
"I refuse to drink water, because of the disgusting things fish do in it"
W.C.Fields
- T1 Terry
- Posts: 13708
- Joined: Fri Nov 23, 2012 3:44 pm
- Location: Mannum South Australia by the beautiful Murray River
- Contact:
Re: Bar jokes
Bloke goes over to chat up 3 rather large lassies at a bar. "Are you girls from England?" he asks noting their broad accent.
"Wales" the 3 girls reply in unison.
"OK then, are you 3 whales from England?"
Three weeks in intensive care gave him time to polish up on his knowledge regarding accents from the British Isles so he didn't make the same mistake again
"Wales" the 3 girls reply in unison.
"OK then, are you 3 whales from England?"
Three weeks in intensive care gave him time to polish up on his knowledge regarding accents from the British Isles so he didn't make the same mistake again
A person may fail many times, they only become a failure when they blame someone else John Burrows
If we have data, let’s look at data. If all we have are opinions, let’s go with mine. – Jim Barksdale, former Netscape CEO
If we have data, let’s look at data. If all we have are opinions, let’s go with mine. – Jim Barksdale, former Netscape CEO
- Greynomad
- Posts: 8020
- Joined: Tue Dec 04, 2012 4:16 pm
- Location: Rutherglen, Vic.
Re: Bar jokes
The Invisible Man walks into a bar...
then complains loudly when the barman ignores him.
===============================
The barman says, "What'll you have?"
Then the Time Traveller walks into the bar.
then complains loudly when the barman ignores him.
===============================
The barman says, "What'll you have?"
Then the Time Traveller walks into the bar.
Regards & God bless,
Ray
--
"Insufficient data for a meaningful answer."
Isaac Asimov, "The Last Question"
"I refuse to drink water, because of the disgusting things fish do in it"
W.C.Fields
Ray
--
"Insufficient data for a meaningful answer."
Isaac Asimov, "The Last Question"
"I refuse to drink water, because of the disgusting things fish do in it"
W.C.Fields