1. When I was born, I was given a choice - a big pecker or a good memory....
I don't remember what I chose.
2. Your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory.
3. A wife is a sex object. Every time you ask for sex, she objects.
4. Impotence: nature's way of saying, "No hard feelings..."
5. There are only two four letter words that are offensive to men - 'don't' and
'stop', unless they are used together.
6. Panties: Not the best thing on earth, but next to the best thing on earth.
7. There are three stages in a man's life: Tri-Weekly, Try Weekly and Try Weakly.
8. Virginity can be cured.
9. Virginity is not dignity, it's lack of opportunity.
10. Having sex is like playing bridge - if you don't have a good partner, you better have a good hand.
11. I tried phone sex once, but the holes in the dial were too small.
12. Marriage is the only war where you get to sleep with the enemy.
13. Question: What's an Australian kiss?
Answer: The same thing as a French kiss, only down under.
14. A couple just married were happy with the whole thing. He was happy with the Hole and she was happy with the Thing.
15. Question: What are the three biggest tragedies in a man's life?
Answer: Life sucks, job sucks and the wife doesn't.
16. Question: Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact?
Answer: Breasts don't have eyes.
17. Despite the old saying, 'Don't take your troubles to bed', many men still sleep with their wives!
Send to the men who need a laugh and the women with a good sense of humor!
Andy Rooney on sex...
- Chuck
- Posts: 2885
- Joined: Sun Nov 25, 2012 10:31 am
- Location: Blue Mountains NSW
Andy Rooney on sex...
Chuck & Catriana
aka Geriatric Gypsies.
2018 VW Tiguan.
White.
aka Geriatric Gypsies.
2018 VW Tiguan.
White.
- Dot
- Posts: 23532
- Joined: Fri Nov 23, 2012 6:12 pm
- Location: Strathalbyn SA
Re: Andy Rooney on sex...
Lots of true ones there for sure
Queen of the Banal & OT chatter and proud of it. If it offends you then tough titty titty bang bang.
- Vik351
- Posts: 1225
- Joined: Sat Aug 05, 2017 3:50 pm
- Location: Adelaide SA
Re: Andy Rooney on sex...
So which one wasnt...???
vik...
Merk 4x4 VF30 519 CDI 2020 LWB V6TD 3 ltr 6 wheeler ,Tenorite Grey ... yep, it's not white ...!!!
- T1 Terry
- Posts: 13692
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- Location: Mannum South Australia by the beautiful Murray River
- Contact:
Re: Andy Rooney on sex...
16, you can't make eye contact because the nose gets in the way .......
and 12 is wrong as well, you only get to sleep in the same room during peace time, well after the peace talks have finished and the man has offered an unconditional surrender
A person may fail many times, they only become a failure when they blame someone else John Burrows
If we have data, let’s look at data. If all we have are opinions, let’s go with mine. – Jim Barksdale, former Netscape CEO
If we have data, let’s look at data. If all we have are opinions, let’s go with mine. – Jim Barksdale, former Netscape CEO