Boozey stories (dob your mates In)

[Dot]

In stead of taking up space on the serious threads I thought a funny page of boozed up stories could be interesting so here is one to start.

Some years ago Norman and Christine landed at Tullamarine airport, my sister and (BIL) Roger picked them up and took them to their place for a couple of nights before they headed over here, as they were about to have their evening meal Roger has a wonderful supply of all sorts of grog from his customers offered the guests a drink. The drink happened to be a bottle of Japanese whiskey with some age to it, not wanting to disappoint the hosts Norman accepted a tipple or two, Christine declined so as you would Norman and Roger finished the whole bottle (mainly Norman) but he suffered badly for the next couple of days I think he was just starting to see through his foggy eyes when they arrived here (SA) Christine was not amused He did not remember very much since they landed until they stumbled here Good onyu Norman, xx NEXT

[wayno]

Oh yes, you bet I have some stories.
Not tonight though, will be back tomorra.

[Greynomad]

This one’s on me.
As a 19yo announcer, the radio station I worked at hosted the local heat of Hoadley’s Battle of the Sounds — a competition to find the best local rock music group.
I was a co-host up on stage.
The winning group threw a party to celebrate, to which the two host DJs were invited.
The grog flowed freely, and as I grew up in the Hunter Valley, I was on the wine. There were so many at the party they had underestimated the number of glasses to hire. They rummaged through the kitchen, and I was handed a tumbler of wine.
I went back for several refills, and lost count. When the party came to an end, I couldn’t get my car keys into the door lock, so the group members bundled me into the back of my Mini panel van, drove me home, and put me to bed.
I was to do my normal 9am-12pm shift on air next day.
I made it to the station and after 30 minutes on air the manager pulled me out and put another announcer on the shift.
I was hauled into his office where he played a tape of my aborted session. I sounded like death warmed up. He had to give the sponsors free make-up ads. He did tell me what I had cost the station, but I was too fog-brained to take it in.
He also gave me a First And Final Warning… which I DID take in.
I NEVER did it again!

I still enjoy my glass of red with dinner, but I know when to stop.

[wayno]

Sorry folks, my well composed addition disappeared on me.

Will try again tomorrow

[Dot]

Sorry folks, my well composed addition disappeared on me.

Will try again tomorrow

Was that your wife Wayno ?

[BruceS]

Nope! Not going to do this "as doing so may offend" ............... you agree RNB?? lol
hehe
haha

[Newcastle George]

Dobbing myself in:

Way back in the day when I worked for De Havilland at Bankstown airport the company invited those that had worked on the Wessex helicopter upgrade to a Tea and Biccies celebration after work at 4pm for the end of the contract.

Rather than Tea and Biccies it was Beer and whatever was left over from the lunch menu, drink as much beer as you can as quick as you can before someone else drinks it. When all was consumed, by about 5:30pm, finding my car in the large carpark was a bit of a problem but I finally managed it and headed home, some 20km via Parramatta.

Driving with one eye closed so that I could determine which lane I was in I finally reached Parramatta, approx 4km from home. I decided that I should take a break and call into a coffee shop. Once inside the shop and having ordered a coffee I thought I should go and check that I had parked the car correctly which, surprisingly, I had before slowly drinking the coffee.

When I got back into my car I decided to just sit for a while to give the coffee time to take effect. I woke up in the dark of night to find that it was 2am and managed to drive home the last 3km only to find that my wife had been phoning evryone she knew trying to find where I was.

I was not too popular!!

Thank goodness the rules regarding driving while intoxicated were put into place.

George

[T1 Terry]

Started at the pub close to the Homebush abattoirs where I was working for a trucking mob. The party moved on from there in a mini bus, finally ending up at a dance type nightclub ...... Still living in Wollongong at this stage, grabbed a cab back to the pub where I'd left the car ..... drunk as a monkey, swearing my head off in the front seat and the cabbie kept giving me strange looks and swinging his head to look behind .... kinda scary why he wasn't using the mirrors .... reached the car, paid the driver and as he drove off, 4 drop dead gorgeous young females lined across the back seat, they had squeezed in together so I could sit in the front and reduce their cab fare ......

Finally got the key thing sorted for both the door and the ignition, headed up the short side road and onto Parramatta Rd, up the wrong side naturally, near head on into a police car ..... swung over to the correct side and looked across to see the two officers just shaking their heads .... at about this stage I realised the sun was actually up ......
Some how managed to get all the way to the toll road between Waterfall and Bulli, somehow managed to pay the toll, further down the road I spotted a nice grassy area on the left with a nice view, pulled over for a quick nap ..... woke up mid afternoon, sunburnt on one side of the face and arms.
Drove the rest of the way to my mothers home unit in Fairymeadow, basically at the foot of Mt Ousley and the end of the road down the hill back from Syd. Staggered up two flights of stairs, realised I was still well and truly p*ssed, wife at the time met me at the door ready to tear me a new a-hole, took one look at the sunburn and rather sad looking condition I was in, laughed her head off, lead me to the bedroom and shut the door to keep the kids out

Thinking back to the Police and me driving on the wrong side of the road towards them .... the old Falcon I was driving was still Tasmanian registered .... maybe the figured I'd lost my second head so I wasn't thinking clearly

At that stage the drink drive theme was, "Drink drive, your an idiot" to which the usual add on was "make it home, your a legend"

T1 Terry

[Dot]

ha ha, There is a story concerning some one here with the name starting with the letter T who was groping another person here with their name starting with the letter D, booze and a tv

[jon_d]

Ok, since I’ve retired and left the company…… true story.

In the nineties, I was traveling the overseas regularly for work. Generally, I’d fly into the US on a Sunday and home on Friday. Week in Melbourne and then out to somewhere in Asia. Japan, Korea, Sing, Malaysia, Beijing and the like.

I’d be meeting with other region reps and lab staff in the US where we’d make plans and then meet with the countries to deploy and do business reviews.Part of this included attending monthly Asia wide country business reviews with my bosses boss (Simon) out of Taiwan.

So, this particular meeting in Taiwan went well and on Friday, Simon hosted my boss and I for a game of golf. All good and on Saturday, we flew into Korea for a review on Monday. Well, on Sunday, Do Hee and Jung Dai then hosted Phil (my boss) and I for golf and dinner.

Dinner includes special desert. Dinner went well.

Special desert is a private karaoke bar (out the back) with a bloke strumming a guitar, a couple of 'hosts' and a bottle of Korean Scotch and us four.

Phil declared he didn’t drink. So the others decided to toast me. I didn’t twig…. Must have been the scotch at dinner too…. But it was one shot for Do Hee and me, then, one shot for Jung Dai and me. A bit like the Kodak deal. 2 prints for one.

All good for a while. After all, I was single and spent most nights down the local so I had a pretty good tolerance. Saturday nights ended up drinking Sambucas.

But, it did catch up. In a big way. It was time to vomit. You know when. That feeling that this is going to be bad. Well I was having that feeling.

Our private room had its own private dunny. Off I go. All casual like. Not to lose any face.

Well, there I am. Wondering what to do and with Belly full of Korean Scotch and KimChi. (chilli fermented cabbage). Almost like on queue, the guitar starts up with a drum backing.

Boom Boom Boom. A beat to throw up too. Just like in the movie; The Shawshank Redemption, where he’s timing the rock with the thunder. Here I am, counting in the beat and hurling. Emptied out and now one knew. Face saved.

So, back I trot. And out comes the Scotch. I didn’t last long, and back into the dunny. Boom boom and baarrrph. Ooops, missed the beat. Actually, I probably missed the next few beats.

Well, Do Hee in a caring voice, sort of asks if I’m ok and I stagger out. They pack me up and send me home. Apparently, I’d earnt my stripes. One of my most enjoyable trips. Not sure what happened to the hosts, but being Korea, one can only imagine.