Joke...

Place your jokes in this section. A little naughty will be tolerated but please no really vulgar ones!!! If you might be offended it may be better to bypass this section!!!
User avatar
norman
Posts: 1967
Joined: Fri Nov 23, 2012 1:14 pm
Location: Home Base...Paeroa.NZ OZ Base. Where ever we happen to be.......

Joke...

Post by norman »

A Kiwi ventriloquist visiting Australia walks into a small outback town and sees a local sitting on his veranda patting
his dog.

He figures he'll have a little fun, so he says to the Aussie, 'G'day, mind if I talk to your dog?'

Aussie: 'The dog doesn't talk, you stupid Kiwi gitt.'

Ventriloquist: 'Hello dog, how's it going mate?'

Dog: 'Yeah, doin' all right.'

Aussie: (look of extreme shock)

Ventriloquist: 'Is this bloke your owner?' (pointing at the Aussie)

Dog: 'Yep'

Ventriloquist: 'How does he treat you?'

Dog: 'Yeah, real good. He walks me twice a day, feeds me great food And takes me to the lake once a week to play.'

Aussie: (look of utter disbelief)

Ventriloquist: 'Mind if I talk to your horse?'

Aussie: 'Uh, the horse doesn't talk either...I think.'

Ventriloquist: 'Hey horse, how's it going?'

Horse: 'Cool'

Aussie: (absolutely dumbfounded)

Ventriloquist: 'Is this your owner?' (Pointing at the Aussie)

Horse: 'Yep'

Ventriloquist: How does he treat you?

Horse: 'Pretty good, thanks for asking. He rides me regularly, Brushes me down often and keeps me in the shed to
protect me from the Elements.'

Aussie: (total look of amazement)

Ventriloquist: 'Mind if I talk to your sheep?'

Aussie: (in a panic) 'Now hang on there, better leave him alone. That sheep's a flamin' liar..'
Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than speak and remove all doubt....
If at first you dont succeed, Skydiving is not for you.
User avatar
T1 Terry
Posts: 15979
Joined: Fri Nov 23, 2012 3:44 pm
Location: Mannum South Australia by the beautiful Murray River
Has thanked: 51 times
Been thanked: 30 times

Re: Joke...

Post by T1 Terry »

Hmmm..... I seem to remember a similar joke, but the roles of the Aussie and the Kiwi were swapped.... made it even funnier cause you had to decipher what it was the kiwi said :lol:
A person may fail many times, they only become a failure when they blame someone else John Burrows
Those who struggle to become a leader, rarely know a clear direction forward for anyone but themselves
User avatar
supersparky
Posts: 8788
Joined: Mon Nov 26, 2012 7:00 pm
Location: Home on the beautiful Gold Coast for a while.
Has thanked: 83 times
Been thanked: 67 times

Re: Joke...

Post by supersparky »

T1 Terry wrote:Hmmm..... I seem to remember a similar joke, but the roles of the Aussie and the Kiwi were swapped.... made it even funnier cause you had to decipher what it was the kiwi said :lol:
:lol: :lol: :lol:
Yep, That was the same version I heard.
Cheers
David

David and Terrie
2006 Winnebago Alpine
Not all who wander are lost.

Return to “Joker's Palace”